Find Parents That Come From The Future - No time travel required

Today I was thinking of preventive parenting; how we can be more proactive about raising great, strong men and women that will be ready to face adversity in the world.

One of our strategies as parents, has always been to make friends with other parents that "come from the future." It is a very simple form of time travel: befriend parents that have children of an older age range than our children. When our children were 1 to 10 years old, for example, we looked for friends that had children between 10 to 18 years old; parents with more kids typically would provide bigger age ranges. 

The benefit? You will start seeing what comes next, what are the challenges their older children are overcoming, what is working for these parents and what is not working. Also, you will learn what tools are available out there now, like books, clases, clubs, etc., so you can educate yourselves and make sure that your children have the right tools in their life backpacks to overcome adversity, struggle, being neglected, bullied... and prevent or avoid these situations when possible, and deal with them when they are inevitable. 

Being better prepared as parents is important, always leaving our worries in the hands of GOD, knowing that we are not alone; He has our backs. 

No Participation Trophies

When our kids were growing up in the early 2000s and 2010s, every player in every team, in every league, in every sport, received a medal and even a trophy, just for participating. There was barely a recognition of the team or player who performed the best, who won the gold medal through skill and effort; "everybody was a winner".

Fast forward to this worldwide-once-every-hundred-years pandemic, with hundreds of thousands of businesses destroyed by shutdowns, millions of quality employees without work, and you notice that the kids that were raised with a sense of entitlement, those who always "won", even if they never won a game,  have come face to face with the real world, where there are a few winners and many losers, where life is hard and “making it” requires effort, lots of it.  

In these very challenging and rapid-changing times, we are seeing many examples of kids that were raised to value hard work, persevere in the face of adversity and adapt to change without crumbling, succeeding and standing out. 

If you want to give your young kids a competitive advantage in the real world, do not give them participation trophies.

How to Be at Peace

Why is it that sometimes I am at peace, working with serenity, and sometimes my anxiety takes control over me, and my body reacts with skin rashes, hair loss, lack of sleep, overeating, overdrinking, you name it?

Today I was doing my morning meditation listening to the priest talk about having peace and bringing peace to others around you. He mentioned that peace is not a state in which nobody bothers you, or in which you have no problems, or where you have no enemies, he was talking about serenity in your heart while working on solving your problems.

Peace is the result of prayer, reconciliation with God and with others, is about having good work ethic, doing good, being charitable, it comes from God's mercy and love.

Try to overcome evil with an overwhelming abundance of good, and think that every challenge that comes to your way, comes with the grace from God to overcome it. Live and work in the present, because today you have the grace for today’s challenges, tomorrow is not here yet and yesterday is already gone.

Many people worry about things that will never occur; control overthinking your problems, and go one step at the time. Don’t let anyone take away your smile and joy, that smile that is the strength for the ones around you. 

Life is good, enjoy!

Coronavirus Quarantine

Today my head is overflowing with ideas on how to make the best of this voluntary quarantine.

We are living a Pandemic.

How can we make the best of it while following the recommended self quarantine? Five children, ages 13 thru 25, three active on online classes, four of us on remote work.

So how can we organize everything? Don’t go crazy and focus on personal growth for you and for your children. Looking to grow in generosity, self-discipline, patriotism, citizenship, charity, responsibility, fortitude, decision making, leadership, prudence, temperance. 

Take care of three main things:

First, your spiritual life: grow in inner peace and be able to protect that inner peace. Also, this pandemic coincides with lent, so we can start by offering all this to God as a prayer, leave all your worries in His hands and accept His will. Make sure to include your children and spouse. Offer to God the little things, like the inconveniences and set-backs of cancelled trips, cancelled meetings, cancelled concerts, cancelled tournaments and also, offer to God the big things that can go from getting sick yourself all the way to the death of a loved one.

Second, take care of your body/health, this includes having a healthy meal plan, preparing your body and your family to be in the best possible shape to be ready if the virus visits your home. Green juices, salads, broths, lots of water. Expose yourself to some sun for a little while. Download an exercise app, for running if you can run outside, for legs, abs, yoga, etc. Do a 30 day, 100 abs repetition challenge with the whole family, make it fun.  Keep social distance with your friends at all times.

Finally, take care of your brain study/work and prepare clean working stations with different purposes, some quiet spaces for quiet work and a different space for video conferences. If you are using a bedroom, make sure the closet doors are closed and that you made your bed, make the working area an enjoyable, clean, orderly place. Little kids should respect the silence needed for the important meeting video or conference call.  Make and extra effort to keep the noise down; don’t turn on the vacuum cleaner or the mixer, or the TV too loud while they all work.

If you do not have outside work obligations, you might want to use this time to learn something new, take an interesting online class, listen to an interesting podcast... my favorite is Jordan B. Peterson.

We are all in this together! It will all pass soon! Be patient and remember that the world needs us to be cheerful and healthy in these challenging times! Good luck!

Freedom

It’s being a while since we last wrote… many things have happened.

Our children have grown, some of them have graduated from college and all of them are now working in one way or the other.

Our home is a more adult world, our youngest is 13 years old and our oldest is now 24. Serious life conversations at our dinner table, work challenges, work related international trips, more responsibilities. Our home is more orderly, our last toys have being donated, trophies are now in a box inside the storage room, clear rooms, many quiet hours.

Life has become difficult, adult world is harsh, international conflicts, conversations about socialism vs capitalism, they challenge our opinions, interesting conversations about the existence of God, international leaders and their ideas.

Now our children are more on their own, living in different countries and only one thing worries me: after all these years of parenting, teaching them virtues, order, obedience, sincerity, loyalty, responsibility, truthfulness; where I have no control at ALL is the correct use of their freedom.

If I look back it was always there, it has always been there, and is the one most important thing God gave us when he created us: our freedom. 

How are you educating your children to have a good use of their freedom? The only way is teaching them to always search for the truth… at a younger age it was about teaching the difference between right from wrong … then getting them to know God, then keeping a relationship with God, but then it comes a time when you may make them sit in the Chapel for an hour but if they don’t want to talk to God they wouldn’t do it… and I think, God would never want to have someone talking to him because someone said so.

Focus on teaching our children the correct use of their freedom at all times, so over the years they may search for the Truth in a good use of their freedom and pray and hope they will have their personal encounter with God.